AWAKE :0(

Well, it is the middle of the night, and I am awake. I slept for two hours 10:30-12:30 and then I woke up--decided to check on Ben, (who was working on an English project when I went to sleep....a Power Point presentation on a poet--but thankfully, he was in bed already)--took some more cold medicine because I couldn't breathe well.....and never could fall back to sleep. i hate that. Between my mind not shutting off, and the fact that the "night-time" medicine seemed to have the opposite effect, I am awake, alert, and mad that I am! So, here I am.

I had a nice birthday overall. I had some moments that were good, and some that were not so good....like any other day. The "not so good moments" were silly....like when the students were trying to guess how old I was--and all guessing older than I actually am--that is depressing! (the average was about 43....the oldest someone guessed was 46--UGH.) Maybe it is time for Botox?? :0) AND, another moment was when I found out that I will be having huge competition for the sub job come interview time....

Apparently, Mr. Adkins has pulled about 5 applicants he wants to interview. While I am justly concerned someone will be more qualified for the position...I also kept trying to tell myself that I still had a real good chance, because I was a "known". He knows me, he knows my character, he has teachers in the school vouching for me, etc. But, today, he got one more application. It was from the student teacher that was in one of the 5th grade teacher's classrooms for the beginning of the year. I forgot about her, because she left at the beginning of November to go do another part of her practicum in a Special Education room, due to her double major. She was sent to another school for that. Anyway--apparently, she has now graduated, and is looking for a job. This applicant concerns me the most. She too is a "known". She also is fresh out of a classroom practicing teaching full-time, AND if she is hired, instead of me....Mr. Adkins would not have another job vacancy to fill....unlike if he hired me. (My current position would be open, and would need a replacement.)

Sooooo.....that has been on my mind today, too. I know it is in God's hands--I know He is in control of these things, and ultimately, He knows what is best for me and the class of children needing a teacher. While I know these things, I can't help but be hopeful that I am the one chosen....and that this was His plan for me all along. The deal is....I may NOT be the one right for this job....and possibly, He may be orchestrating things differently for me. I can see why taking this job now might not be good timing....considering i have two classes to take between now and July, and also, we have a move coming at some point, too. BUT-I also see how this would be the perfect opportunity for me to "babystep" my way back into the teaching role. I need to trust Him. I can't help thinking about it, though.....and wondering how this all is going to turn out.

To end my blog tonight (this morning, I mean)--I will leave you with two "quotes" from my birthday cards from the kids....things that particularly made me smile:

--"Happy Birthday, Mrs. Sterling....I hope you have a Funny Bunny Birthday!" (this was from a very serious boy in Mrs. Smith's class. He is the kid that raises his hand to tell her when she has calculated something wrong, spelled something wrong, or if her definition of a word is not complete enough, in his opinion. :0) (Anyway, I was not expecting a lighthearted wish from him!)

--"It's your birthday! Wake-up and have some cake! That way you'll be the first to get a peace. I hope you have a great birthday!" (Now there is an idea for all of us! Just get up and eat your cake first thing! Then you don't have to worry that someone will get to it before you! Ha ha.....Too funny!)

They really do crack me up. I never go a day without something funny being said, or done by one of the kids. I hope I never lose appreciation for the innocent or quirky things the children say and do. :0)